Yesterday’s FUCK YOU AND SHUT MOUTH post was too kute. I have such a soft spot for broken English. Not only does it send me back to my younger years growing up in that illegal immigrant household with the 8 people in the closet-sized studio apartment, it also reminds me of moms who (she’s so cute) three decades later, still hasn’t learned English very well because who the hell speaks English in Southern California anyway?
(Okay, that’s not completely true. She likes to pretend she doesn’t know English but I know that she at least knows how to READ English — as in READ the English written in my diary when I was in high school which kinda got me kicked out of the house JR year but I came back SR year when we patched things up and things got even BETTER when I left for college but that’s a blog entry all on its own. One you probably won’t be seeing on here as it’s a story even too sordid for this family-friendly blog of ours.)
Anyway, FUCK YOU AND SHUT MOUTH reminds me of an Israeli girl I encountered this past summer in Guatemala who, while hiking up a mountain to see a really neat lake, had to take a leak. So, to her European friends’ amazements, she dropped off the trail to go behind the bushes and came back pulling up her pants. I don’t know why her friends were so horrified, as this type of behavior isn’t uncommon on hikes, but they were. So she felt the need to smile and explain to them,
“Israelis are pee everywhere!”
Nobody bothered to correct her broken English, which leads me to believe that everyone present shared that sentiment, particularly since we were in a country whose genocidal government Israel went above and beyond its divine call of duty to aid.
And because her country continues to send support and advice around the world on how to kill the civilians, the possibility exists that she was genuinely pissed about it and chose to voice her I’m-mad-and-I’m-not-going-to-take-it-anymore anger by yelling, “Israelis are pee everywhere!” from the mountain top in her not-so-broken English.
Related posts:
- Horn-Dog Nation: Israelis Demand Their Leaders Neutered
- Israelis Get a Taste of Their Own Medicine
- Israelis here, Palestinians there. Apartheid?
- Israelis Adopt What South Africa Dropped
- FUCK YOU AND SHUT MOUTH
hi, my name is quiqui and I’m not happy with who i am.
Posted by Anonymous | September 6, 2007, 8:56 amLOL, this is funny. “anonymous” is a hater.
Posted by nadia | September 6, 2007, 10:09 amAnd as such, should be a Kabobfest regular poster.
Posted by Anonymous | September 6, 2007, 12:31 pmThis was a great post, QuiQui.
QuiQui, even if anonymous (your Zionut ex?) is right and you are not happy with who you are, I must say that I am happy with who you are.
If posting on KABOBfest regularly makes you feel better about yourself, than go ahead and post away baby.
If you start to feel really shitty about yourself — i.e. you start to think of yourself as incoherent, small-minded, and wimpy — then go to other blogs and write non-sequiturs anonymously. That’s what I do to boost the old self-esteem.
Will
Will
Posted by Will | September 6, 2007, 3:27 pmYou know, I tried and tried, but I didn’t understand anonymous’ post(s?). I initially gave him/her too much credit and stared at it for several minutes trying to decode its philosophical underpinnings. And then I realized that maybe he/she thought I was supposed to be unhappy with myself if I wasn’t already and that this was just a reminder?
But why, tho? I’m witty as fuck.
I’ve concluded that he/she just wants me to FUCK YOU AND SHUT MOUTH.
I doubt it’s the Zionut ex. FUCK YOU he could totally go for again but SHUT MOUTH? Come on… he’s a man if you know what I’m saying.
And I think that you do.
I think anonymous isn’t happy with who I am because I’m happy with who I am and Will has only dun’ made it worse now because we’re doubly happy for who I am. I’m sorry anonymous! I’d like to make you happy too. Here, repeat after me. I’m told this works:
“I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, Israelis are pee everywhere!”
Posted by QuiQui | September 6, 2007, 4:33 pmFor claiming this blog doesn’t generally criticize Jews and Israelis but the political practices of the country, this post is rather hypocritical and inappropriate.
Posted by Anonymous | October 28, 2007, 8:37 pm