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Israel Arrested, Rampaged With A Bulldozer After Faking Suicide And Manuevering To Attack Iran

So the dude defrauds investors and steals their money. After he’s caught and sentenced to 20 years in jail, he fakes his own suicide. And finally turns himself in after police interrogate his accomplice girlfriend.

Meanwhile, a “terrorist” who does not belong to any group, plows through Israel with his bulldozer. Israel was horrified at the sight of such “first of a kind” rampage, and as a result, decided to suspend all acts of bulldozing through or over Palestinian homes, towns, Palestinians, or international peace activists.

“Who knew running some one or their house over with a bulldozer is so terrifying,” said Israel Prime Minister Ehud Olmert.

In other news, Israel continued his busy schedule with an aerial exercise recently that is widely thought to simulate and attack on Iran. Well, if you are a supporter or Iran, humanity, world peace, or just simply anti-war and don’t know why, here is the good news; Israel is unlikely, and most likely incapable, or attacking Iran, although he is the one strategic beneficiary from an attack on the rival regional superpower.

However, if you are one of the above, here is a reading of recent news that should make you wet your pants: The White House just took the diplomatic route with North Korea; the lesser criminals in Washington owe the neocons one, and it is likely that Iran will have to pay, especially as it becomes increasingly unlikely that the republicans would retain the White House.

If anything, Israel’s maneuvers are either a decoy to allow the Cheneys, Feiths, and Wolfowitzes to operate away from news headlines, or a preparation for a second round of attacks Iran puts him in the crosshairs in retaliation.

It seems like McCain will not get an opportunity to fulfill his campaign promise.

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Discussion

No Responses to “Israel Arrested, Rampaged With A Bulldozer After Faking Suicide And Manuevering To Attack Iran”

  1. Well, if you are a supporter or Iran, humanity, world peace…

    Does the phrase “mutually exclusive” mean anything to you? How about that old Sesame Street song that goes something like “which of these things doesn’t belong with the others?”

    Posted by programmer craig | July 3, 2008, 12:22 am
  2. Your writing is almost as bad as NarcelX. Don’t go crying to your mommy or start whipping out your “Iraqi Kabob”; I’m just making an observation.

    Posted by Firouz | July 3, 2008, 9:33 am
  3. That is a beautiful cover pic.
    There’s 40,000 lbs of precision guided munitions in that bird, and it’s about the size of a fat parakeet on radar.

    Posted by Anonymous | July 3, 2008, 9:35 am
  4. Have you guys seen this yet?
    Hahaha!

    Posted by Anonymous | July 3, 2008, 1:15 pm
  5. What, you think THEY built the drills to get the oil out of the ground with? They can’t even manufacture their own weapons with which to use incorrectly. Intelligence has never been the Arab World’s strong suit.

    Posted by Burraq | July 3, 2008, 1:23 pm
  6. Ha ha Craig, you always crack me up. I’m so glad you’re back.

    Making war creates peace.

    BRAINS!! I need BRAINS!!

    Posted by safiyyah | July 3, 2008, 4:24 pm
  7. Baby, I’ve been a bad writer since before you learned how to read. Not about to stop cuz of you.

    Posted by Fayyad | July 3, 2008, 4:58 pm
  8. haha..Fayyad habibi you are GREAT.I enjoy all of your writing , I like the fiery passion you inject into everything you write.
    Cheers!!

    Posted by Anonymous | July 3, 2008, 5:14 pm
  9. Making war creates peace.

    No, but finishing war does.

    Saffiyah, what you need is an “Iraqi Kabob”. Well, NarcelX left, but perhaps we can find you a substitute. Any takers?

    Fayyad, point taken. I respect that.

    Posted by Firouz | July 3, 2008, 6:36 pm
  10. Meanwhile, a “terrorist” who does not belong to any group

    That’s not true.

    Three organizations took responsibility for the attack, including the al Aqsa Martyrs’ Brigade, which is loosely affiliated with Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas’ Fatah movement.

    The other two are the Galilee Freedom Battalion, which is suspected of being affiliated with Lebanon’s Hizbollah guerrillas, and the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine, a fringe left-wing militant group.

    I have also been reading that the murderer had a Jewish girlfriend with whom he had a baby. This was not taken well by his community. He also was in legal problems over drug use. It is very possible that Islamist terrorist groups identified his weaknesses and convinced him to commit terror to purge his “sins”.

    Posted by Firouz | July 3, 2008, 8:06 pm
  11. You’re very good at making clever assumptions Firouz, although the Israeli police seem to discredit your theory.

    Posted by Mohammad | July 4, 2008, 2:30 pm
  12. Mo, so now you BELIEVE in the Israeli Police?!

    Note, dear readers, that Mo said “Israeli Police”, not “Zionist Occupation Army”, or the like.

    We have made progress, my friend.
    Now, if only you will accept my people in peace, we can all live together, our faith in a fair society ensured by the venerable and trusted Israeli police force.

    Posted by Firouz | July 6, 2008, 11:56 am

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