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21 Reasons America Blows Europe Out of the Water

Spending two days stranded in European airports and flying with the Spanish airlines makes me an expert on Europe and its affairs. I love Europe, both the old one and the new one, but I think America’s got them by the nuggets. While it is true that Europeans used to be healthier than Americans, the trend is shifting–Europeans waists are gradually growing in diameter as they abandon their dull diet. I know Europeans are notorious for making fun of Americans and their lifestyle. I had to think about few things that America got right while Europe was taking a nap.

1. America has way better, faster, and cheaper Wi-Fi: for an hour of Internet in a European airport you can feed a needy Afghani family for two weeks and have enough change to buy yourself a dirty magazine to celebrate your good deed.

2. European money looks like Monopoly money. Seriously, the Euro bills are wacky, funky colors, tiny, and boring. When the cashier handed me my change back, I was like, “I gave you a nice, clean, crisp dollar bill, and all I get is a ‘Go Directly to Jail!’ note.”

3. Everything in Europe is smaller, and I mean every freaking thing. Their coffee cups are far too small, Euro baguettes are microscopic, and their donuts do not hit the spot. Cars are too environmentally conscious to function. Hello, have you ever tried to buy a Coke in any European Capital? Both Volume and Portion are smaller.

4. By not speaking their native tongue, Europeans assume that you disrespect them or that you are an ignorant bastard. Thus you know deep down the well-meaning people of Europe are on a mission to teach you something new about how awesome Europe really is.

5. American Starbucks in Europe sells more coffee in one day than all European coffee houses combined. McDonalds in Europe sells more meals per day than all restaurants in Europe combined. While America runs on Dunkin, Europe runs on Starbucks.

6. American companies or their subsidiaries own all the major brands of Europe—Lays, Orbit, Coca-Cola, CNN, Time magazine. And even Gold’s Gym is a popular fitness center—the idea that American getting Europeans to slim down is priceless.

7. With the exception of Steven Seagal, no American goes to Europe to be famous. Most famous Europeans are so because they made it to America—I am looking at you Christian Bale, Penelope Cruz, Arnold, and Amy Winehouse! (But maybe this one is famous because she is insane rather than European.) Even the snootiest of Europeans will concede the fact that America dominates pop culture and everyone else is playing catch up.

8. Arab immigrants in America, although facing many unique challenges and struggles, are far happier and far more integrated than their peers in Europe. They also have more education and better jobs than their peers in Europe. America is known for its more flexible class barrier.

9. Europeans do not clean up after themselves in restaurants. Eating at a number of self-service cafes and restaurants in the airport, I was shocked to see people walk away and leave their garbage behind. This actually reminds me of back home, where we as little boys eat and somehow the dishes get washed and mysteriously disappear. To be fair, Americans only do that at movie theater.

10. It is true Europe has a much more sophisticated culture and a richer history than the States, but I would trade all of that at any moment for an iPod. Who cares about what some dead dude said or did not say hundreds of years ago? The future is whatever Steve Jobs and Bill Gates say it will be. Van Gogh, Picasso, Dali did some fine paintings, but if it was not for Google search, few would have seen their masterpieces.

11. Europeans smoke a lot more than Americans do. This is odd because Europeans have always been conscious of adopting healthy practices—at least since the plague. Not to worry, American tobacco companies make all the profits from killing the Europeans. America strives to play fair in their dealings with the world. Thus, American weapons kill Arabs, and also American tobacco companies are killing Europeans.

12. American public restrooms are superior to the European ones, maybe because Americans eat a lot more than the Europeans do–and therefore they spend, on average, a lot more time unloading–has something to do with maintaining clean and neat restrooms. The Europeans bathroom really scares me, and to make things worse I had a guy yell at me in Spain to give him some toilet paper as he was standing in the urinal holding his fun size rocket—no, it wasn’t Senator Larry Craig either.

13. Americans are the world’s most popular tourists according to several sources, namely in Jerusalem and in Oman. They are approachable, fun loving, adventurous, neat, and they tip will. In Europe it’s a mixed bag: Italians are fun, but not so neat; Germans are unapproachable, good tippers they are not; the French are fun loving, but socially awkward, and the Greeks are the messiest of them all.

14. For all the sex and romance that pops to mind when people talk about their vacation in Europe, Europe’s population is aging and shrinking, while Americans engage in baby making sex. According to my ancient grandma, “no babies no sex”

15. Americans eat a lot more dark chocolate than Europe—a much healthier choice than milk infused chocolate. Due to the lack of great American-made milk chocolate, more Americans opt for the dark chocolate, rich in antioxidants and better for the heart tissue. If you are in Europe, it is really hard to resist the seduction of the silky and smooth milk chocolate bars that are as easily obtained as a beer keg in the Iraqi Green Zone.

16. Diversity is wonderful. In America however, we all seem to agree to speak English to both friends and strangers and we do not investigate the other person to see what language they speak—at least not as much they do in Europe. Pretty much every country has its own language and every region has its own dialect. That can be a hassle when you are traveling cross Europe. Do you speak English in France and suffer the consequences? Or do you try your Spanish in Spain only to find out that the cashier’s English is rustier than your Spanish. In America, no need to put your twang on as you are heading to Texas, people will understand you. For the record though, some find it hard to make out what I say most of the time, just like when you are at an authentic Chinese restaurant.

17. Because only Jack Bauer from American show “24” can stop and neutralize the bad guys, Europe cannot even come close in introducing their own version of tough detective saving French lives. Jack is Back! Inspector Jacques Clouseau is so fired!

18. Americans males do not shy away from giving a piece of themselves to a just cause. The cause is stopping the spread of sexual transmitted diseases, and the piece they give is their foreskin.

19. Americans are better drivers, American driving skills are far superior, and Americans have to put up with a lot less traffic than their counterparts in major European cities. Also American can navigate the road while changing songs on their iPod, text massaging, and talking on blue tooth. So much for the European public transportation system helping to lower the congestion. Europeans pay much higher gas taxes, even higher car taxes, a lot more tolls, and there is almost no free parking.

20. Because real men do not sunbathe in Speedos.

21.No, I will not be taking a chance on you ABBA

[Tarboush Tip: Lyndsay]

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270 Responses to “21 Reasons America Blows Europe Out of the Water”

  1. Have you ever lived in Europe ? I think not . America is sensationalized with a lot of hype .I don't know what is so special about America unless you compare it to Africa

    Posted by Drew | January 6, 2013, 6:20 pm
  2. After reading through some of the comments it appears that many of you don't realize that every single one of these points is a sarcastic joke with some subtle underlying truth. Now if yall excuse me I have to drive my hummer to Mac donalds and get me a BIGMAC!

    Posted by George Washington | March 20, 2013, 12:09 am
  3. There are ignorant and uneducated people everywhere. Consumerist and materialistic way of life and thinking is wrong, because it is short-term, unsustainable and it is based solely on greed, selfishness and on a false perception that material things will satisfy our needs and make us happy. Quality always comes before quantity, natural food is always better and tastier than gmo or processed food. Appreciation of culture, art, knowledge, moral and ethic values is crucial for survival of civilization. When the entire system or society is money driven and everything else is ignored, than you get dump, ignorant, irrational thinking people, and in mostly cases commercial propaganda shapes our thinking and behavior.

    Posted by dagy | March 26, 2013, 11:23 am
  4. your full of crap, your second point almost instantly ruins any credability you would have, this reads like its writen by a 12 year old who has a hate for Europe. Another point is europeans will only think your arrogant if you dont try to speak something in thier language, but of course you wont be able to speak their language but off the airport the staff will instant show you how to say hi in their langauge which is enough to be not called arogant as you have 'tried'

    Posted by dave | April 5, 2013, 8:34 am
  5. Okay, I've lived in Europe and America, and I must say that both continents have their strengths and weaknesses. No place is perfect. I happen to prefer living in America (I'm American). It is funny because you Europeans have a very short memory, and claim to be tolerant, yet you get on this message board and claim how much you hate the U.S. etc. There are many many ways America is better than Europe, and vice versa. Overall, I would ask Europeans to show a little respect for the U.S.; after all, without us, you would all be speaking German and living in a fascist continent. Also, America virtually rebuilt Europe after WWII. Anybody want to argue with this? Your very existence is a testiment to the money and good will of the Americans after WWII. Also, America is the de facto world police because Europeans are too pussy to take care of their own messes or assist us (but when they need help, they come running to us). Remember Bosnia and Kosovo? That shit happened on your continent, and you whined and bitched about how America should step in and intervene. When you need us, you whine like little bitches, yet when you don't need us, you often degrade America and her policies. Who would you rather have policing the world…China? Russia? Be glad that it's America. All of you posters who degrade America sound more like you're jealous of us; it just shows. A recent Gallup poll of millions of people surveyed in over 154 countries found that if given a choice of anywhere to live in the world, America was #1 by far. The only European country in the top 5 was France. This speaks volumes. People want to be us; want to be with us. And as for culture, I would say that what do you think film, TV, music, and books are? Europe pretty much copies our youth fashions and music. Most sports of the 20th and 21st centuries were invented in America. So there's your culture. We have been a country longer than most European countries. We have over 235 continuous years of democracy and nationhood. Most of you Europeans were little piss duchies and small kingdoms while America was already a nation with a constitution and bill of rights. The original poster posted that shit more like a joke, and it seemed to really hit a nerve with you Europeans. You see, we know our imperfections, but when you are told yours, you get all bent out of shape about it. That's about all I have to say now. This is my real name. You Europeans stop whining and bitching on this message board, or I'll come back and post a list of like 100 ways America is better than Europe. I keep it handy for such occasions. But for now, peace.

    Posted by Chris Hajek | April 6, 2013, 3:13 pm
    • Got it all wrong bruv. You see the British won world war 2 and you people Are very big headed praising your country not even taking a chance to study history. You guys re-write it . Oh yeah we have got the eco cars here and don’t forget we are the makers of home grown food whilst u guys like it ready and processed . Get your facts right before you open your mouth and speak in the english adaptation voice of yours. Oh and we Killed Hitler (the british did) and you were just there to help and at that time we still Kinda owned you.

      Posted by Naomie the british are coming | July 26, 2013, 10:06 am
    • You have successfully made me pissed off by your trolling. Congratulations.

      Posted by UWM | June 7, 2014, 11:35 am
  6. …but here is the list anyway, in no particular order.


    1. USA has much better business and entrepreneurship climate than EUR
    2. Generally much less red tape in USA in all areas of life
    3. Sports, fitness, and extreme sports trends of 20th & 21st centuries mostly originated in USA
    4. Health care QUALITY much better in USA (not to be confused with health INSURANCE, which is abysmal). People from all over the world come to the USA for treatment when it really counts.
    5. USA has more balls dealing with global problems than EUR. Europeans sit on their asses while they let Americans do all the work. Think Bosnia, Kosovo, Somalia, Haiti, and Japan etc.
    6. Spirit of volunteerism and humanitarian aide stronger in USA
    7. Most trendy fashions originate in USA; EUR copies them mostly.
    8. Generally lower consumer prices in USA
    9. Most music trends of the 20th & 21st centuries originated in USA; EUR then copies these. And yes, even techno/electronica started here, in Detroit in the '70s.
    10. Best TV originates in USA and is copied or translated the world over
    11. Best films are from USA. Yes, there is a lot of trash, but also a lot of brilliance. Great EUR films can be counted on two hands.
    12. Much lower gasoline prices in USA
    13. USA much more innovative than EUR, as evidenced by countless patents and inventions; higher per capita than EUR.
    14. USA culture generally much more laid back and friendly than EUR
    15. Natural beauty much more stunning and extreme in USA than EUR – from tropical to arctic and everything in between; from 6,200 meter mountains to 3 oceans.
    16. New York City is the de facto capital of the WORLD!
    17. People in USA generally have better sense of humor than EUR
    18. More variety of building and housing styles in USA
    19. Consumer is KING in USA, evidenced by unparalleled customer service culture and 24-hour, 7-day-a-week shopping.
    20. Business settings are much more informal in USA
    21. USA citizens generally the most patriotic in the world. They have a true love of their country, even with all her flaws. EUR mostly patriotic only during international soccer matches 😉
    22. USA has much more well thought-out interstate highway system than EUR. We use more logical exit numbering system and interstate signage.
    23. Population GROWTH in USA vs. DECLINE in EUR
    24. USA is the most multicultural society in the world; EUR generally very homogenous and has sharp delineation of class, ethnicity, and religion.
    25. Flying private planes and getting pilot's license MUCH cheaper in USA than EUR
    26. USA slang is so cool that EUR adopts it into their own languages
    27. Idealism more alive in USA than EUR
    28. USA better known for friendliness and openness towards visitors than EUR
    29. Driver's education generally FREE in USA
    30. Driving age generally 16 years old in USA, instead of long wait to 18 in EUR
    31. Driver's license in USA generally less than US$30!
    32. USA has the best academic and research universities in the world
    33. USA generally less crowded than EUR
    34. Wider streets and roads in USA, with much more logical layout than EUR

    Posted by Chris Hajek | April 6, 2013, 7:39 pm
    • Saying something just to say it is anecdotal and you and the author are making things up or using extremely weak. You need to look up your facts.
      1.The US has no real entrepreneurship almost everything is outsourced look it up you’re wrong.
      2.The U.S has far more red tape and I thin you need to look up what red tape is.
      3.Sports which you speak of came from Europe like football soccer rugby list goes on.
      4.Health care in America over all is broken keep up with the news at all? I guess not lol According the New England Journal of medicine America’s health care ranks below Cuba and Albania ranking U.S. Healthcare at number 34th in the world.
      5.America has no balls if America did we wouldn’t need to use drones and missiles. And you are a clear fascist and should kill yourself your generation is to blame for why the United States ranking is so low. Being an arm chair tough guy makes you as weak as America. Unless we are trying to make Hitler proud it doesn’t matter how America does in a war since America hasn’t fought a war since Desert Storm look it up.
      6.America has the wort human you’re making things up again we have had to deal with FEMA not doing their job leaving folks in Catrina high and dry many times look it up.
      7.So you’re an arm chair fashion expert are you? fact is America and Europe trade off and you’re are most likely a fraud because you’re wearing something from Europe and don’t know it.
      8.Consumer Price has risen if you bothered to keep up with Forbes we have a disappearing middle class and a flux of 1 dollar store poping up all over or you’re dumb and blind look it up.
      9.I have clearly lived longer than you because you knew nothing about trends over the last 30 something years. Both America and Europe influences. England has been the biggest for a long long long time. Plenty of kids in my day wore English Flag T Shirts so shows how little you know.
      10.Television? You really are stupid. America’s TV shows rank really low in America as well as Europe and there’s a ton of TV shows that were English or Australian that became popular .
      Bet ya feel stupid.
      11.Since America has more box office flops than successes I think we can end this one .
      12. 3 to 4 dollars at the pump is far from being cheaper than Europe since I have driven there this myth is busted.
      13.USA can’t be more innovative when the technology is made in Germany and developed in Japan and most other things are out sourced do your homework because you’re looking pretty dim right now.
      14. U.S.A was recently ranked one of the most unfriendly places look it up and America has no culture moron as we are a multicultural country and the cultures aren’t American they are from Europe South America ect. America isn’t like European countries idiot there’s no such thing as an American race.
      15.America has a major meth problem and our economy is shot so most are stressed for a living nothing natural about the premature age stress. Fact Norway and Finland blow the United STates out of the water in all categories look it up.
      16.It’s physically impossible for New York to be the Capital of anything since it’s just a city no one has declared you claim as fact but rather opinion Recent polls show America has been losing influence with the world aka we are alone idiot. Look it up.
      17.Polls has shown American are too thin skinned and tend to get hostile since kids today are too emo.
      18.So are we an Arm chair architect? where’s the proof of these claims? Fact is we have a generic style since most of America has been built over or burned and rebuilt. America has been around of a little over 200 years it’s physically impossible to have more styles nice try but weak. Many people from Europe find the U.S. dirty and trashy and having been to Europe it’s true their cities are much prettier more culture developed over centuries. look it up this myth is busted.
      19.There are many consumer kings world over some of them American and Walgreens isn’t a culture my 20 something moron.
      20. Business are more informal? Might explain why the U.S moved it’s industry to places like India ha ha ha ha ha!
      21.Putting other cultures down is racist not patriotic little Hitler. You generation is responsible for ruining this country and kids are the least American like you. Patriotism like what you speak of is nothing new since America fought this old paradigm from English loyalist why don’t you go move there they love kids who aren’t free thinkers.
      22.No we use a system that simpletons like you can use lets not forget America’s math skill ranked 27th in the world. Owned look it up.
      23.America has a huge flux of immigrants so that title belongs to the countries of origin.
      24.Thi is where you got your facts mixed up and shows you didn’t do your homework and also you just contradicted yourself.USA has more people per capita so it renders the statement moot. Europe has comparable multicultural people. If you’re going to make stupid claims at least be well traveled because anyone who’s been in the military or went to school know Europe is loaded with Africans and Arabs.
      25.9/11 need I say more dumbass?
      26. Europe doesn’t use our slang except to us this is a myth. Lived in England tard and you wouldn’t be able to understand them. myth blown don’t confuse the internet with the real world.
      27.Anecdotal lets see proof.
      28.recent polls showed this is wrong and now you’re repeating the same statements multiple times showing you really don’t have a good solid way of providing readers with evidence of these claims.
      29.No it’s not it’s done state by state, are you even from America because you seem to know very little about America.
      30. Yes in America we are stupid enough to put a child behind a 2 ton vehicle gg OMG 2 years shall I call the WAAABULANCE for you?
      31.So? FYI the U.S Dollar is worth less than the Euro look it up.myth busted.
      32.Once again making this up. American right now ranks 2 England 1 as the 2 best schools world wide, this is moot because over all like the banks Educational institutions hold a wealth of American debt, my sister is still paying her student loan off and she’s 48yr and she’s ma chemical engineer. In Germany education is becoming free before it was very affordable thus proving the world with some of the best and most to the global market and jobs. America has far less graduates and i’m guessing you’re not one of them. Moot myth busted.
      33. les crowded? prove it, oh wait you can’t know why? Look at the population of Los Angeles New York Chicago ect per capita. myth busted
      34.This doesn’t matter since America is a newer country and many countries can claim this like Australia New Zealand Canada China Russia and so on. lol

      Posted by James | April 17, 2015, 3:51 pm

    35. USA has best space program in the world. The ESA is okay, but it is a conglomerate of several EUR countries. NASA is from ONE country alone.
    36. In USA: FREE REFILLS on drinks!
    37. English is the international language because of the USA
    38. Modern EUR owes its very EXISTENCE to the USA (think post-WWII reconstruction and Cold War protection). You're welcome.
    39. USA generally has a much more fun attitude than EUR
    40. Amusement parks and resorts MUCH better in USA
    41. USA generally not as critical and cynical as EUR
    42. EUR so "health conscious", yet MUCH higher smoking rate than USA. Smoking is one of the single worst things you can do to your body.
    43. USA has some of the most shit commercial breweries in the world, BUT…the USA has the best microbreweries in the world, by both flavor and innovation.
    44. Much more diverse and exciting wildlife in USA
    45. The genius of integrated closets in USA housing
    46. The genius (and comfort) of central heating and cooling in USA housing
    47. More national forests per capita in USA than EUR
    48. More national parks per capita in USA than EUR
    49. USA is the leader of the free world; everyone else follows. We're not perfect, but would you rather it be China or Russia?
    50. Larger supermarkets in USA
    51. Larger drugstores in USA
    52. More advanced toilets in USA
    53. USA by far the #1 country in the world where people would move to if they could (Gallup Poll 2013)
    54. Sexier women in USA than in EUR. Reason: ethnic diversity, shaving habits (you know what I mean), and hygiene
    55. Best porn in the world is from the USA
    56. Generally in USA, people shower daily and are much more fresh and hygienic than in EUR
    57. Some of the most important inventions are from USA: laser, computers, internet, email, cellphones, digital cameras, air conditioning, sunglasses, electric guitars, deodorant, nutrition labeling, microwave, motorcycle, solar cell, TV, light bulb, refrigerator, airbags, powered flight, GPS, etc. etc. You're welcome!
    58. USA people better about removing unwanted body hair than EUR
    59. People in USA urinate in streets MUCH less than in EUR
    60. Less graffiti in USA than in EUR
    61. USA has lower unemployment rate than EUR
    62. USA people generally harder working than EUR counterparts
    63. The whole EU just an imitation of the USA
    64. Much better race and ethnic relations in USA than in EUR
    65. USA people generally much better about picking up their dogs' shit than EURs
    66. Kitchen appliances, and washer and dryer, almost always included in USA housing.
    67. USA people have much more individuality than in EUR
    68. USA has the most advanced, bad-ass military in the world

    …so some of you European types might be a little pissed off after reading this, but it is hard to compare a whole continent (Europe) to just one country (the USA). So it goes without saying that things on the above list apply more to some European countries than others. And obviously some things are more opinion than fact. But I know what I'm talking about: I lived 16 years in Europe. Anyway. Suck on that for a while.

    Posted by Chris Hajek | April 6, 2013, 7:41 pm
  8. Zey forgoht zu wreit zat ze toilets (batherooms) in Europe are not frei, zat ze toilets are aktueely paid. If you wants to scheiss and you got no spare change (coins, muenzen), you are out of luck….

    Posted by Jimmy Jones | April 20, 2013, 1:08 pm
  9. Almost every intelligent person knows that 9/11 was an inside job. Google/Youtube that and don't forget to also search for "Larry Silverstein" and "Controlled demolition 9/11" plus "chemtrails".

    Posted by Abdullah Fatiq | April 20, 2013, 1:13 pm
  10. God….. are you idiot? O__O I have the answer: YES! Just an idiot, jealous of europeans and europe!
    We have the best cities: Paris, Venice, Rome, Florence, London, Barcellona, Milan, Berlin, Wien, Stockolm, Helsinki….etc.
    We have the best education system!
    We have the best cars!
    We have the best food: Italian, french and spanish!
    We have the most beautiful languages in the world: French, Spanish, Italian, Greek. And btw, you don't have a language! Your language is not yours! You speak an european language! Remember this!
    We have an highest quality of life. much more than USA!
    We have less crimes than USA!
    We do not practice the death penalty!
    We do not give guns to children!
    We don't eat every day cheesburger or cakes!
    We have the best wines!
    We have the best beers!
    We have the best history!
    You have the most dangerous cities in the world!
    We are not mad!
    We are not fat as american people!
    We have invented much more things than americans!

    USA exist thanks to europeans! Your country has an european name (AMERICA from Amerigo Vespucci), you speak an european language, in your veins there's european blood! You may call yourself "american" but you are european.

    Posted by Luke | May 9, 2013, 6:26 am
  11. #18: Circumcision does NOTHING to reduce the spread of STDs. This is a dangerous myth that has been perpetrated over the years, and if it was true, then why does the USA have HIGHER rates of STDs than Europe does, after adjusting for population difference? And not every British guy has foreskin, and not every US guy has been cut, so this argument doesn't even make sense in the first place!!

    Posted by Jason | May 18, 2013, 8:20 pm
  12. HAHAHAHA xD QUE IDIOTA!!! bitch please… thats all i have to say! (im both portuguese and american – live in portugal – love europe!)

    Posted by Portuguese&American | May 25, 2013, 6:57 pm
  13. You are very wrong.. That was the case maybe a long time ago.
    Europe leads in all of these things"
    1. Better education, more cultural and interesting. SO PLEASE dont mention the Ipod or Bill Gates or Steve Case. Picasso, Renoir Da VInci will last forever.
    2. Better medical care and much cheaper
    3. healthier people, less fat and living longer
    4. Much lower crimes or death, Europeans (men, children, and old) dont go around killing folks as in the USA.
    5. Cops dont go around hurting, abusing or killing innocent people
    6. better mass tramsportation
    7. more holydays and paid vacation
    8.better movies
    9.better food, specially in Spain, Italy, Greece, Hungary, Portugal, France.
    10. Better wine
    11. Better tennis players, footballers, F1 drivers, Moto GP, cycling (baseball and USA football and not world sports)
    12. Better artitst
    13. rock and roll I would say is even.
    14. burgers and hotdogs the USA is top
    15. Invading other lands and killing innocent people the USA tops that too
    16. Complaining the most while traveling to foreign lands, USA tops that.
    17. No learning a 2nd language, USA!
    18. MOre sensitive. smiles is fake and ALL is AWESOME, the USA
    19. Religion over the top, USA but when it comes to living that "christian" life is something else specially when is time to kill or invade other lands.
    20. More cars, more contamination and more roads and less space for people to walk, USA.
    21. ALways in a hurry and while traveling "lets see europe in one week", USA peple.
    22. Internet and staying in touch, the USA tops that and is something I love.
    21. USA also leads in better entertainment like theme parks and things to do. I love the USA and many other things from there but Europe is home and I prefer it here.

    Posted by Marta | June 3, 2013, 2:39 pm
  14. this is written by a troglodyte- amurika, nasty, violent land of guns and wars an monopoly by a military industrial complex is inferior to europe- just a cupla pts on the 21 reasons- r if u do not like languages and try to spk them U R an ignorant bastard, 12- i don't like bathroom attendants but amurican b rooms are filthy 16 diversity? americans are – at least the many rt wing ones, republicans- racist

    the person who wrote this is unobservant, at the least is he in the military? sounds like it

    Posted by dave | June 6, 2013, 12:01 pm
  15. Wow, Europeans can be really stuck up.
    They claim to be more healthy, even though their smoking rate is way higher.
    They claim to be more tolerant, but look at what they think of us! They should just hop off their media’s dick and think for themselves.
    They claim to have invented more, even though the USA created the car, telephone, and even the simple, but very important light bulb. Americans’ inventions have been far more significant.
    It is way more expensive to live in Europe.
    Not all Americans are fat, morons. Is this the only insult you can conjure up? There are fat people in Europe also.
    No, we don’t walk around with guns killing each other. Idiots.

    Posted by Adam | July 7, 2013, 8:14 am
  16. You went to Spain for 2 days. You know practically nothing about even Spain let alone the rest of Europe. Expert you say? Name all 50 countries. 'Europeans aren't as healthy as Americans'. Hah. hahah. HAHAHAHAH. funny joke, like the rest of your false speech. Now go cry in a pile of grease and Big Macs while criticising others to look good over your uninviting character.

    Posted by Fuck you, man. | October 4, 2013, 5:40 pm
  17. Why do you “europeans” always try to convince yourselves that you are superior to America? It’s pathetic.

    Posted by A | October 27, 2013, 2:44 am
  18. Looking at the comments, Europeans an Americans are pretty much the same. Arrogant, judgmental, and proud.

    I find it funny that you are taking credit for things other people did. You didn't invent your devices, you didn't create your products, you didn't form your government. What are you proud of? That you happen to have been born in a certain place where other people have done things you are brainwashed to like?

    We're all humans, we're all pretty much the same. If you want to be proud of something, then tell us what you yourself accomplished.

    Posted by Boyd | December 17, 2013, 7:51 pm
  19. 1. You clearly don't include Brazil in your definition of America
    2. Germany gave you the Tahler – now called the Dollar
    3. Donuts are not meant to hit the spot – it is not a meal – it is barely food
    4. English is a European language.
    5. How can we thank you enough
    6. I wouldnt say Gold's Gym is popular
    7. Your pop culture is dominated by Brits, Aussies and Canadians
    8. Arab immigrants have "more education" in America? Really? I don't know what to say
    9.In European restaurants, it is normal for waiters to clear the empty dinner plates and wine glasses at the end of a meal
    10. The iPod was designed by a Brit, the search engine was invented by a Brit – and yes the internet was created by a Brit
    11. You are already running out of reasons and you are only half way through
    12. I suppose you may need wider cubicles
    13. Tipping is considered an insult in some places. Do not treat them like beggars. They should be paid properly for the job they do.
    14. I think you mean "No sex, no babies"
    15. Seriously? Comparing the chocolate? You are way out of your league here
    16. Languages are a "hassle" yes. But they are interesting too. No-ones expecting you to be fluent. Just say Hola or Bonjour!
    17. Sherlock Holmes or Poirot – best detectives, ever
    18. European foreskins? Ok now you are really running out of things to brag about
    19. Räikkönen, Schumacher, Hamilton…etc. etc etc.
    20. Again Brazil? (see 1)
    21. Miley Cyrus

    Posted by eurokev | December 20, 2013, 10:56 pm
  20. Why is it that every time I visit Europe and begin a discussion on anything it sooner or later results in American jokes? Then I remember, everyone's pissed off at how AWESOME we are. You're jealous – you want to be us! The fact is, we are better at….. everything…#MichaelPhelps

    It's seems that all these Europeans do is analyze our politics, benefit from our products, and our culture and then when we show up to see their cold, wet, crowded and overpriced countries and they try and insult us. I'm initially blindsided by the rudeness, but then I remember it's because they're jealous of how AWESOME we are. I guess if your products and culture were constantly a part of my life then I would be a bit jealous too… but they aren't. I'm too busy BEING AWESOME to be mad at you guys, until I come over here and realize how bitter you are that you're NOT AMERICAN!

    Do you all remember a guy named Adolf Hitler? Yeah, your welcome. Everyone hates us until they need us and we come save their ass. #TrueWorldPower #USNavySeals

    @ Ben Collier – we're corrupt? You all have legalized prostitution – that's called HUMAN TRAFFICKING. If you hate our culture so much how come I walk into a LOCAL bar, not a McDonald or Starbucks, and on multiple occasions and countries find myself listening to Jay-Z and Miley Cyrus? You joke that we're a "Bastard Nation" (you're contradicting yourself but I'll work with it) I love being a melting pot if that means I get to be around hot Asians all day. #AsianFetish. Benny boy, benny boy….. enjoy your little island. I'm going to enjoy being AWESOME!


    Posted by AMERICA's AWESOME | February 2, 2014, 6:12 pm
  21. yeah, comparing a country to an entire continent, because that makes a shitload of sense. as far as im concerned, you should just be happy with whichever country/continent you live in. they are both excellent places with terrible flaws, but nothing is, nor will anything ever be, perfect. besides, America and Europe are allies, we should be cooperating with one another and not criticizing each other for our flaws. most of the people in the comments section im sure are adults, but most of you act and sound like little fucking kids. all that being said, this article was useless and unnecessary. I am an American and damn proud of it! that doesn't mean I will blindly defend it like it is perfect, which it isn't! the same should go with anyone else and the country they live in. geez, society these days.

    Posted by serperiorruler101 | February 11, 2014, 10:40 pm
  22. Y'all fighting over nothing. There's no such thing as the best nation or continent in the world. Also, you are full of hatred, not all europeans are the same and no all north americans are dumb or fat. There's a little of everything in all the countries.

    Posted by Common sense | March 1, 2014, 6:44 pm
  23. Im an asian and have lived in both europe and america…and both places suck now…full of filthy poor people …thieves and criminality….look at the crime level statistics in america and european countries…all are disturbing…higher than many asian countries. What life do these stupid countries offer anymore? No freedom…too much control…everyone hating each other…jealous people…frustrated living in expensive places where they have to work so hard to even basically survive now…and worst of all western countries have no society left anymore…divorce rates out of control…child abuse…racism getting worse…so much intolerance for humanity…america is a greed driven classless country and europe is a continent full of hypocrites who are depressed and suicidal….neither places are good anymore…and they live on printed fake money…but europeans are sad and severely unhappy people who are too provincial and closed minded to even fully accept someone from the next village…

    Posted by Worldtourist | March 17, 2014, 6:44 pm
  24. Wow. Well there ain't many articles about how 'Murica is better, mostly it's about how healhier Europeans are, so OK, I won't get mad. This article is a nice way for an American to be calmed and hang the flag once again.
    I honestly don't know anyone who goes to Starbucs, probably because I don't hang out with dummies wearing an American Flag on their hoodie, wearing sunglasses when it's cloudy and always bearing their overpriced, large and damn sweet coffee. Because they think the American lifestyle is 'awesome', knowing it it from watching HIMYM and TBBT. Also, and I can't speak for the majority, but people in my area don't like the sweet milk chocolate unless they are little children.

    Also, I really laughed at the portion of ignoracy spreaded in this article, sorry to say it so boldly. You have to know some fact about the nation before you judge it. Lot of people and nations, my country included, got independent of the communism quite recently, just decades of years ago. They don't give a damn about an American disgusted due to the lack of fast and ubiquitous Wi-fi. My grandfather was in concentration camp shortly before the end of the war, althrough he was newborn, and due to that he is as skinny as a Slenderman. My little father used to play with toys in his granddad's small apartement when the Russian tanks arrived and occupied the whole country, and I smile thinking about how rebellious my family was, especially my grandmum who would openly talk about the communists in a really bad way in public and her husband and children had to stop her. The European history is large, long and includes many conflicts, and due to that, people might have prejudices towards citizens from other countries who have attacked them (several times) in the past as well as towards the 'modern American lifestyle' which spreads, weakens their habits and traditions and creates a whole generation of sissies (and ingorants).

    America surely has many good things, but I don't think huge cars, streets, portions and amount of Wi-fi are the best examples. But althrough you had freedom for white rich men once bigger than it was in Europe, it hasn't developed since then, while in Europe people don't have imbecile rules, don't really give a **** about whether the game your child plays is for 15 or 17 years old, I've played games for 18 years old as well as my cousins, brother and frineds have since we were six and yet we aren't keen on school shooting. Which is an interesting fact.

    People don't care about your religion as long as you don't try to make them believe in your god/s, and religious people usualy don't. There weren't any debates about whether we should teach creationism in schools, althrough I know some schools in germany for instance where they do teach it, but most of the Europeans considers it to be a joke.

    America might be a multicultural country, but in Europe you have all the original, various cultures not very far from each other, in their original locations.

    Just. . .uh. I'm only getting angry writing this. I know it's lame to lead this Murica/Europe fight with patriots but I just couldn't help myself. Just realize that we learn world's history so that we don't make the mistakes again, it's f*cking polite and average to know about world's inventions and invertors and only ignorants don't feel an urge to read something about them. Quality above quantity. Get overeated with worse and huge hamburger or sandwich when it's cheaper isn't really better. Don't giving a **** about the global warming but keeping chatting about it won't change anything. While European countries have restricted their production by signing the Kyoto Protocol while the US causes almost one quarter of the world's pollution.

    P.S.: I won't ever get that you can have a shotgun before you can have a beer and you still won't be able to drink an alcoholic drink in public without a paper bag.

    Posted by T. E. H. Kenway | May 12, 2014, 4:04 pm
  25. What a load of tripe! The things in this that ARE true, are the minuscule things only a dimwitted redneck would think worth noting! I've NEVER seen a McDonald's in France even half-busy, and many in Italy had to close down, and that's just ONE point.

    Posted by grammatteus | July 11, 2014, 2:28 pm
  26. You are a fucking idiot and an embarrassment to this country.

    Posted by An American | July 11, 2014, 5:34 pm
  27. Wow…do America a favor…kill yourself.

    Posted by Kryssy | July 22, 2014, 6:59 am
  28. I don't understand you people. The Americans or the Europeans posting. This article is obviously stupid and written to create exactly this argument. Some people are nice, smart, and polite. Some are rude, obnoxious, and loud. This goes for every country. They teach this in kindergarten(grade school). All you guys are doing is living in a ignorant bubble and shutting out people from other cultures.

    Posted by ameircano | September 9, 2014, 3:51 pm
    • I agree completely. The person who wrote this article clearly was biased in the first place, and is acting disrespectful, ignorant, and rude. I apologize for all of the Americans who have posted rude and degrading things towards Europe. I promise most of us are not like that… The “US is the best!” mentality needs to stop.

      Posted by candid | January 27, 2015, 1:28 pm
  29. You all wrong, mars is where it’s at!

    Posted by Han Solo | October 17, 2014, 4:33 am
  30. First of all, America is the best country, we started out by beating Europe and in the little time America has been a country, is the most advanced country by being ahead, discovering new things and outsmarting our enemies.

    Posted by I Win | November 5, 2014, 9:27 pm

    Posted by YASIR | December 6, 2014, 11:07 am
  32. best thing about europe is that morons like you live in america.

    Posted by guest | January 6, 2015, 9:15 am
  33. This must be a publication from THE ONION, correct?
    Which idiot would write this for real?

    Posted by Sasha | January 6, 2015, 8:32 pm
  34. Articles like this are one of the reasons why many Americans stay ignorant. And some who have traveled, don't really learn anything.

    Posted by tisme | January 29, 2015, 2:08 am
  35. It seems to me like this article was written by an envious American. Monopoly money? Really? I'm from Canada… We have monopoly money.

    Posted by Parris | January 29, 2015, 8:31 am
  36. ''Who cares about what some dead dude said or did not say hundreds of years ago? The future is whatever Steve Jobs and Bill Gates say it will be. Van Gogh, Picasso, Dali did some fine paintings, but if it was not for Google search, few would have seen their masterpieces.'' this just show your inculture.

    Posted by Eduard | April 9, 2015, 11:37 am
  37. As an American I feel I obliged to speak up and say something to all the Europeans here…
    don't come to America…
    It kinda' sucks.

    And although i could go on and on about why America is not a great as Americans make it out to be, I really want to talk about the people. You must understand something.
    Americans are nice to people,
    until they get to know them.

    When you get to know people in America, you'll see they hang out in cliques and will shun people away and are increasingly rude. They like to make a good impression, but they don't actually care for what you have to say.

    And Americans are not arrogant, they're just stupid.
    They seem arrogant because they know nothing of the world around them. When asked about topics like these they say all this great stuff about America but never seem to have any knowledgeable facts about other places.
    Ask some Americans where the Berlin wall and 70% won't know; 50% won't even know what Berlin is, (to the Americans, Berlin is the capital city of Germany). So don't get angry about Americans dissing other countries. Teach them and they will understand… eventually.

    Now I may seem like a hypocrite, being American and dissing America at the same time. But I'm leaving America very soon, (to Denmark for the 1% of people who care) following the other 2% of Americans smart enough to see through the blindness in American culture and finally leave.

    But seriously, as an American I can tell you, it's not all that great.
    Didn't mean to rant but somebody had to do it.

    P.S. As a last minute joke here's a fact about America.
    It has the most incarcerated citizens per capita,
    so I guess you could say the American way is,
    If you have a problem, put in jail, (or shoot it).

    Posted by Den Kriger | April 11, 2015, 1:21 am
  38. America lol
    Here's some facts you left out Lindsey and the majority are weak and un proven as they are the weak ramblings of a generation that are helping the destroy out nation and are not real Americans.
    America is: 1. 7th in litracy
    2. 27th in math
    3.43rd in Adult Female Mortality
    4.42nd in Adult Male Mortality
    5.22nd in science lolol yay Go America woo hooo!! Fun fact Mexico ranks higher than the U.S in over all math and education. lol USA USA USA lolol
    6th49th in life expectancy.
    6.3rd in Median house hold income recent polls show U.S.A is now 4th.
    7.3rd in labor force.
    8.37th in HEalthcare. USA USA USA lol
    9. America's GDP is as high as American debt China owns 10% of American debt. On March 6, 2015 U.S debt reaches 13.08. trillion. Since America doesn't seem to pay it's debts back any better than some European countries we have no room to talk since all we do here is increase the debt limit. This is pathetic politics and poor economics.
    10.Quality of life is far better in many Europeans countries rather than the US which ranked 6th on top 15 percentile and Forbes which is more spot on ranked Finland over Norway but top 2 America didn't cut the mustard Australia,Sweden, Canada beat America too lolol Norway, Switzerland.
    11. Bad spending that cheats it's citizens out of infrastructure and healthcare as well as over all quality of life. Yes U.SA spends more than 26 countries combined 25 are our allies. Unless you're adof hitler this is not a list you want to be on.
    12. America leads in the number of citizens incarcerated. Another list you don't want to be on. Translates to that America has failed it's people. fun little fact America beat China in this area and China massively out populates America.
    Yep Lindsey, stick a fork in you because you're done.

    Posted by Xillbalba | April 17, 2015, 4:15 pm
  39. Have a laugh. This must be taken with humor. It's very stereotypical, especially because you can't talk of Europeans as a people as much as Americans. All these posts about Europe/America being better than the other only show how butthurt the writer is.

    Posted by Alessandro | April 20, 2015, 12:45 pm
  40. Over-the-counter treatments are available graffiti removal product from many hardware stores, but the highest quality and most reliable ones are only available commercially. Some can be harmful of applied incorrectly

    Posted by concrete cleaning | April 30, 2015, 10:53 am
  41. #14 was an embarrassing joke. The grossest part of America (And I love her) is the baby-centric society. It sickens me.

    Posted by thewaywithin | July 8, 2015, 8:03 am
  42. This whole page is so chock full of bullshit and untruths. This author is an embarrassment to USA.

    Posted by Guest | July 21, 2015, 11:38 pm
  43. I agree with all of this except for the circumcision bit. America needs to stop doing this for no reason. Having foreskin does not put you at any more risk than abstinence or wearing a condom.

    Posted by Anthony | August 16, 2015, 5:47 pm
  44. Have you ever been to Europe? I would never exchange rich European culture for an iPod (Apple just perfected MP3 devices that were already there), I don't see why everyone should speak English where it is not phonetic nor the most widely spoken among people on earth. I have no idea where you took your statistics from on Starbucks and tourism, but I can assure you that anyone can enjoy coffee in Europe, you just need to go to proper Restaurant. And stop measuring film stars only by looking from Hollywood perspective. USA does one thing way better than Europe, it commercialize and promote. But is it that McDonald, Ralph Lauren perfumes, Fossil watches or GM cars really classy and posh? Good things promotes them self.

    Posted by IsntItTrue | September 24, 2015, 10:41 am

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