Ten Palestinian Crappy New Year’s Resolutions
With things looking worse than ever for Palestinians, I can only say “Crappy New Year.”
Still, what would the start of the new year on the Gregorian calendar be without new resolutions? Like the United Nations’ resolutions against Israel, the vast majority will go unenforced; but their proclamation has become a tradition of sorts. This list is of ten suggested resolutions for the Palestinian people.
We hereby resolve:
10. to stop consuming mindless Arabic and western pop music and entertainment programs, and bring back the quality resistance music and art of yesteryear.
9. to quit smoking (argeelah included) and to somehow increase Zionist smoking (argeelah included).
8. to boycott everything connected to Zionism in any way, shape or form.
7. to eat more zaatar, black seeds and olive oil.
6. to not be ashamed to admit Israelis have improved on falafel and hummous, but to boycott them anyways until there is historical justice.
5. to end the Fatah-Hamas divide, the Iran-Shia’-controlling-Hamas conspiracy, the glorification of either side, and the rank partisanship.
4. to record and document the stories of the Nakba survivors we know.
3. to stop blaming everything on “the yahood” and start blaming Zionists, Palestinian/Arab collaborators, the United States and Europe.
2. to stop waiting to be saved by Zionists, Palestinian/Arab collaborators, the United States/Obama and Europe.
1. to empower ourselves, get organized, and work towards a historically just end to Zionism within one political entity, rather than settle for what we are told is a practical solution in the form of two states (since Palestinian statehood next to Israel is pure, unobtainable fantasy). And this involves a smart strategy based on the historical experiences of other anti-colonial struggles (so also stop thinking the Palestinian experience is so exceptional in history).
Add your own in the comments section.
